Confidence crisis
Why can’t I look like a supermodel?
I went to a conference with work recently. Mid-lunch, I saw a beautiful woman walk into the hall. I couldn’t believe how attractive she was and I suddenly wished I’d opted for the salad instead of the lasagne. I was sitting in my seat feeling slightly inferior and intimidated when she came over and sat down at my table.
I kept telling myself in my head that I shouldn’t be so silly and insecure because although she was beautiful on the outside I was definitely beautiful on the inside. I was comforting myself with thoughts of my lovely personality when this beautiful girl started to speak.
As she spoke words of encouragement and affirmation to those in her entourage it was like she was scattering flower petals all over the place and in doing so making the world a nicer place. I was horrified!
Considering surgery
Now I was in trouble. Not only was this girl completely gorgeous but she was nice too. I could take no more. I dragged my sorry self outside and wallowed for a while in self-pity. I couldn’t bear how insignificant I felt compared to this woman. I felt stupid for being so insecure. I told myself to snap out of it. While complaining about my body shape, need of new clothes and the possibility of surgery etc I realised I had a choice to make. I decided that I could continue being bitter and jealous and just give her blank looks to make her paranoid or I could just encourage this woman instead.
I chose the latter option. It turned out she was delivering a workshop and she was nervous. I told her she would be great and that I would come to her session especially so I could smile at her to make her feel better. I did just that. She was great. I felt better too. Maybe in some way she was able to be more beautiful because I was allowing her to. Maybe her beauty actually helped to reveal more of mine.
I found out later that this girl was a friend of a friend and we’ve met randomly through work since and have been able to encourage each other. I am so glad I chose the encouragement option. I almost missed out on a lovely friendship.
I guess we all get insecure at times but maybe it’s during these occasions that we get an opportunity for our real beauty to shine. I guess no matter how we feel we always have a choice on how we will respond. The surgery can wait!
Written by Gill Young.
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