The Big 3-0
I’m one of those people who will occasionally get asked for ID when buying wine at the supermarket. While I may look young for my age, I can’t get away from the cold, hard fact that I will soon be turning 30.
Thirty seems so grown up, responsible and mature. But I’m not any of those things; I don’t yet feel like a grown up. I’ve always been the youngest – in my family, in my workplace and in many of my friendship groups. So it feels strange to consider that I’m not really that young any more.
I can’t quite fathom what it is about turning 30 that seems so daunting. Is it that I’m getting old? Or are my ‘best days’ now behind me? If you had asked me at 15 what my life would look like at 30, I think my answer would have been very different from my current reality. I thought I would have done it all by now; travelled the world, had a successful career and seen my name in lights… not to mention having all the domestic things covered; a husband, children and a home of my own.
The new coming of age
Now that I’m here, 30 suddenly seems young and certainly not past it. It’s as though adolescence has extended to include my twenties and 30 is the new coming of age, the new 21. I feel just about ready to dip my toes in the grown up world, rather than hanging up my boots already.
Thirty is a significant milestone. It’s time to take stock, reassess and consider what I’ve actually been doing with my life. I’m very happy with the way my life is shaping up so far: I’m on track with some of my plans, and some of the things I once deemed important don’t seem quite so inviting now.
I wanted to know whether others my age were feeling the same way, so I got in touch with all my Facebook friends who were in my year at school and asked them how they were feeling about turning 30. Here’s what some of them said:
- “Turning 30 is an interesting time… some days it bothers me and other days it doesn't! I can't believe I will no longer be a twenty-something, but I am certainly a lot more comfortable with who I am knocking on the door of 30 than I was when I turned 20!”
- “Turning 30 leaves me feeling quite anxious. The past 10 years have flown by. I don't feel old enough to be turning 30, and definitely don't feel like a grown up most days. It's the worry that everybody is looking at you, wondering why you're not marrying your fella, after being together 8 years. Or why there isn't the pitter patter of tiny feet! I don't feel ready for either, but you become aware that you are getting older.”
- “I'm not worried at all about turning 30 in terms of ‘how old?!’ but more amazed at how fast time has gone. Turning 30 seemed such a long way off and now it's only a few months away.”
- “To be honest, all I am focusing on is having a really good party. It's a land mark as it were! The way I always think about it is... if I had been shown who I was ten years ago who I am now, I would have been happy and proud - and more than a little surprised!”
- “By the time I am 30 I expected to be happily married, own a BMW Z4 and have won business woman of the year, sadly, I will achieve none of these feats. 30 has always been a nemesis and you feel you should be settled, know where you are going but for me, it just isn't like that... maybe by the time I am 40!”
- “I think finally I have reached the age I have naturally always felt I was at, and I do feel comfortable with things. However with less than a year to go there is a lot of thought about what I could, should and have done”
It was interesting to see that some people felt better about it than others. It got me thinking: why do we put all this pressure on ourselves to have achieved things by a particular age? And is this something that we all do? So I decided to find out…
How about YOU?
We’ve put together a survey to find out what people think about turning 30, whether they still have a few years to go or the moment has come and gone. You can take part here. It only takes a few minutes, and your responses can be anonymous. Please do fill it in and let us know your thoughts. We’ll publish the results here on Looking at Life in the New Year.
Written by Lindsey Sisk. Posted on 25th November.
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